Revised Cut
Here is the revised cut of your film.  We have made edits to the rough cut to address your notes.  Please review this cut and provide an additional round of edits if needed.  We have provided 2 cuts that differ only in one sequence at the 1:40 mark to see which you prefer. We will then prepare the final cut of your film, polishing it with a final color grade and sound mix. Thank you and have fun!

Rough Cut provided below for comparison.